They're Not Bringing You Decisions

What do you do when you don't trust someone? They're not a bad person; they're likable, reliable, and get things done. But you just don't trust them to make decisions.

A client described this problem to me recently. One of his employees simply wasn't making decisions. He gave me an example, and then another. But neither mentioned a decision. Both ended with some version of the same question: "What should I do here?"

I asked my client what he did in these situations. "I answered him. I told him what I would do," he said.

...

His employee wasn't bringing him decisions. He was bringing him questions. And every time my client answered one, he trained the employee to bring him the next.

The problem is, you can't assess someone's decisions when you keep replacing them with your own. And you can't trust someone when you don't trust their judgment.

So we changed the system. The next time someone brings you a question, don't answer it. Ask for three options. Ask what the upside, risk, and tradeoff are for each. And ask which option they'd recommend, and why.

This doesn't go directly from "I don't know if you'll make the right call" to handing over the keys to the car. But it opens the door.

The goal is to see how the person thinks: what they understand, what they're missing, and even what you may be blind to.  You may still make the final decision, but now you're examining their judgment instead of substituting yours.

Do this consistently, and you'll see a change. Questions become options. Options become recommendations. And recommendations eventually become "By the way, I took care of it."

That doesn't happen overnight. But trust doesn't begin when you hand someone a decision.

It begins when you can see how they make one.